Save us !
Be afraid, be very afraid. Paris Hilton is threatening to unleash another series of "The Simple Life" upon the world. What have we done to deserve this ? I tell you, play this show to the Iraqi insurgents and they'll capitulate quicker than Paris' clothes come off when there's a camera near.
Where are they finding these people who are willing to be on the programme ? They only exist to be laughed at by these silver-spoonfed bimbos who, combined, are less intelligent than my cat. I heard they were looking for a lesbian couple with children to impose on for this new series. I can just imagine the caring and compassionate way they would be presented. If previous episodes are anything to go by, they'll be asked impertinent questions about their sex life, probably in front of their children, within the first 10 minutes. Hopefully, nobody's been daft enough to volunteer.
What annoys me most about Paris Hilton is not her stupidity or her slapper behaviour. It's her blatant, unashamed desire for fame at any cost. She is heir to a massive fortune but this isn't enough for her. She wants everybody to know her name and doesn't care if it's only because they're laughing at her. She has no self-respect and therefore no respect for anyone else, as evidenced on the show. If I had her money, you wouldn't know I existed. I'd be off enjoying it somewhere and minding my own business.
Now you know it's only a matter of time before one of the British channels decides to do a UK version. What do you reckon, Jade Goody and Abi Titsout, sorry Titmuss ? Oh, the horror, the horror.