A Mischief Of Magpies

If the Sun were the size of a beach ball then Jupiter would be the size of a golf ball and a Mischief of Magpies would be as small as a pea.

Friday, January 13, 2006

And Now For The Headline Act . . .

May I encourage everyone to vote for your favourite Daily Mail or Daily Express front page of the year? There's some absolute classics, from 'Murder By Playstation', through 'March Of The Gipsy Camps' to 'What Would Diana Say?' In the end, however, I had to plump for:

Just, wow.


At 1:06 am, Blogger ill man said...

Jaw dropping. I'm reminded of a satire in Viz about the daily machinations of The Sun. One brilliant mock headline was "TV Arse Bandit Dies Of Puff Plague"

That one displays a similar sense of perspective and sensititvity which makes it a winner in my book.

At 8:10 pm, Blogger Clairwil said...

I voted for no13 which manages to combine Diana, Gypsies and Asylum Seekers. Truly remarkable! It could only have been bettered if they'd managed to shoehorn in something about single mothers and house prices. I hate The Mail and The Express. If George Bush came up with one of his schemes and bombed The Mail and The Express I would support him. At least there would be no loss of human life.

At 8:43 pm, Blogger Paul said...

Brilliant. I voted for "32 Men Die of Child Porn Shame" because it entirely sums up the Daily Mail - a fantasy story designed to appeal to peoples' most voyeuristic instincts while trying to pretend to occupy some sort of moral high ground. It is a truly revolting newspaper.

At 2:55 am, Blogger ill man said...

I think that's also part of their genius. It's all about the headlines. What they usually have as raw material for stories is fairly prosaic. Add an outraged headline and BINGO!, suddenly people are interested and they've bought the blasted thing before they realise that no, asylum seekers are NOT streaming through Dover in their millions, Diana HASN'T been resurrected from the dead by The Queen and Tony Blair in a bizzare zombie ritual and no, gay couples are NOT entitled by law to induce your children to homosexuality. All of which must be a crushing disappointment to some.

Basically the Sport would kill for the sort of fiction these idiots chuck up on their front pages but they realise they can't compete, so they just stick to the tits and bums and know their place.


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