A Mischief Of Magpies

If the Sun were the size of a beach ball then Jupiter would be the size of a golf ball and a Mischief of Magpies would be as small as a pea.

Tuesday, June 06, 2006

Things that annoyed me this week.

1) Finding out that they now PAY kids to stay on at school. If they do A-Levels, instead of earning their pocket money like the rest of us had to do by stacking shelves in supermarkets, dragging our gangly teenage corpses out of bed at the crack of dawn to do paper rounds and babysitting the hellspawn that lived two doors down, they now just get paid £30 a week.
Bastards!
Anyway, who is going to be doing all the paper rounds and stacking all the shelves now?
It's going to be the pensioners, isn't it because they can't afford to live otherwise.
Does anyone else think this is a bit messed up?
At least the kids have the ABILITY for all the lugging of papers and bending for shelf stacking....

2) Drivers who sit in the middle of dual carriageway A roads waving for pedestrians to cross in front of them when the pedestrian obviously didn't mind waiting to cross the side road they were turning into.
YOU'RE STOPPED ON A FUCKING A ROAD, YOU MORON!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING???
Don't stop to let me saunter across the road or you'll get a juggernaut up your boot!
Stupid cretins.

3) Grace from Big Brother. Just her face appearing on the screen is enough to turn me into a raging Hulk-like figure. I almost wish I had a golden ticket JUST so I could go in there, call her a cunt and punch her in the smug-looking face.
Hard.
Repeatedly.
SHUT UP YOU CONTRADICTORY, EVIL COW!
God, I hate dancers.

*takes deep breath and counts to ten*
Aaaaaand relax.

4 Comments:

At 5:49 pm, Blogger Head Apollo said...

I think if you gave every child a year of work before their final school year they would work a lot fuckin harder when they realise what kind of shit McJob is waiting for them if they don't get an education. I count myself in that.

 
At 8:48 pm, Blogger matt lobster said...

Totally agree with all of those. The dumb-fuck drivers who think they are doing some greater good by blocking everyone while thay direct people and traffic from their beaded car seat should all die now. Evolution needs a kick up the ass!

 
At 1:06 pm, Blogger creepylesbo said...

I know a few Europeans thanks to the wonders of blogging and most of them have done a year's national service. I simply can't imagine how this country would be if we all HAD to do national service for one year at the age of 18. It simply baffles me when I try to imagine it. I'm not big on the whole 'killing other people' thing but I'd love to talk to European youngsters and see what they think of it and how they think it changes people. I mean if all the people in the Big Brother house had done National Service I wonder how many of them would be in there now?
Glyn would at least have learnt a few life skills.

 
At 10:21 pm, Blogger CoconutCain said...

YAY for random annoyances! Brilliant post. Very entertaining.

-K.

 

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