A Mischief Of Magpies

If the Sun were the size of a beach ball then Jupiter would be the size of a golf ball and a Mischief of Magpies would be as small as a pea.

Friday, April 21, 2006

This Interwebnet Thingy

Now, here we are again. This is beginning to become a bit of a habit, isn't it? It makes you wonder what people did when they had lives, instead of the internet*. Not to worry though, it will not be that long until we all have the internet wired directly into our brains and then we can give up all this tiresome business of having to lug our big superfluous bodies to and from the computer.

Anyway, all that is far into the future, unlikely to happen for the next two or three weeks at least, which still leaves us with plenty of sandwiches to make. It also gives us time to do many of the ruder things we have always wanted to do with our bodies, that is while we still have them.

So, if you have always wanted to smear your naked body with low fat cream cheese spread and then go out and rub yourself all over a traffic warden, now is the time to do it. If you have ever felt an almost uncontrollable need to engage in religious dialogue with a semi-naked Jehovah's Pervert who is buttering scones and half-watching the shopping channel on TV while you encase yourself in a human-sized jelly mould filled with cold baked beans, then perhaps now is the time to begin making the arrangements.

Well, perhaps not quite yet, as you still have a handful of links to click on, or a few RSS feeds left unread, and there is that email you ought to answer, and….

*But only briefly, there are so many links these days and just too little time.

Not too sure about this one...

When I was at school, in the sheltered suburbs of Edinburgh, I came out as bisexual.

I was sixteen.

It took less than one day for the entire school to know.

People shouted "Dyke!" and "Lezzy!" and other deeply intelligent remarks wherever I went. They crossed to the other side of the corridors when I walked past, in case they 'caught' it. They spat on me from the top of stairwells.

Do you know how hard a mouthful of gob lands on you coming from up high?

They even threw lemon coloured Opal Fruits (Starburst now) at me.

Nothing could be done about it. Section 28 was in place at the time, and teachers refused to discuss my sexuality with me, or the discrimination I was facing as a result. Section 28 has since been scrapped.

Eventually the idiots got bored of me and moved on to torture someone else.

School is a nasty place. The idea of taking a large number of vastly different people, closing them in together in a pen, teaching them things that they're unlikely to ever need in their lives as adults and refusing to police the inevitable situations that arise seems like madness to me.

Which is why I was sort of pleased to read that a court in California has ruled against gay bashing T-shirts.

The T-shirt in question had "Be Ashamed, Our School Embraced What God Has Condemned" on the front and "Homosexuality Is Shamefull" on the back.

The lawyers for the student whose T-shirt it is, claim that being forced to stop wearing it infringes on their client's religious rights.

Whatever. It was only a T-shirt. Banning it will not make the prejudice go away. I see why they reached this verdict, that for it to be worn in class was distracting to say the least, and creating a hostile environment...but all the ban has done is create a martyr for Christianity's fundementalists.

Which is exactly what the student - who wore it in protest of a tolerance day and challenged the school to suspend him over it twice - wanted to achieve.

With thanks to Feministe.